Relationships: What Mark Did You Make?

Teaching Values:

Checking in with your kids each day is a great way to help them remember their values and to focus on the type of person that they want to be.  And a great question to ask each night is, “What mark did you make today?”

You see, every time you are with someone you leave a mark – either a “gold heart” or a “grungy mark” depending on how you treated them.

The Golden Rule:

When I was a young girl, my Dad loved to talk about the Golden Rule – “to treat others as I would want to be treated”. The Golden Rule was really about treating other people with kindness and respect. When you are respectful (giving gold hearts), it builds rapport, trust, and connection with others.  When you are disrespectful (leaving grungy marks), it can cause resentment, anger, distrust, and conflict and can build an emotional wall between you and the other person.

Treating others with kindness and respect is the foundation for happy marriages, meaningful friendships, successful careers, and joyful families. Teaching our kids to live by the Golden Rule will help them learn how to create successful relationships in their lives.

Leaving Gold Hearts:

So tonight at dinner, I invite you to share this idea of giving “gold hearts” or leaving “grungy marks” with your kids.  Ask your kids to brainstorm example of how they can give gold hearts.  They might come up with ideas such as helping with the dishes after dinner, playing nicely with their siblings, or saying “thank you” to their teacher.  Also talk about how they can handle challenging situations with gold hearts.  Give them scenarios they can work through such as not being included on the play ground, not being invited to a birthday party, or not being picked for the school play.   Practicing scenarios will help your kids learn how to handle interactions with other in a way that leaves gold hearts instead of grungy marks.

To turn this into an everyday practice, simply ask your kids each night, “What type of mark did you make today?”